Today, I read a story that my friend posted about her ex and long distance relationships. I told her how I could relate to her story with how I am grieving for Irwin. I miss him and hate being away from him. I left Los Angeles because I was not happy with my over all, but I was happy with him. My friend Max asked me that if I loved him, why did I leave? I told him that it was because moving here was my dream. I don’t regret leaving. It was the scariest and bravest moment of my life. Leaving my family was easy but leaving him was horrible. The man I loved. It was the hardest thing I have ever done and I have had a life time of hard decisions from the time I was two. I know loss more than anyone. I lost my mother( twice), my acting coach, grandparents, friends and now him. She told me that it takes half the amount of time that we were together to get over him. I was with him for 3 years 7 months and 10 days so that means we were together for 1290 days. Half of that is 645 days so by January 17th, 2017 I should finally be over him.
My scariest though is what if I never stop loving him in that way and never find anyone else.